For the Hubbys - Hormonal Mood Swings and How to Deal With Them

Well Hubbys, I've got some good news for you, and some bad.  The good news is your wife is pregnant and you are going to have a new addition to your family.  The bad news, your wife is going through her own version of hell and might take some of it out on you.  Yep, you guessed it, hormonal mood swings.

Hormones are a fascinating thing.  They can make our boobs bigger (big plus for you guys), can make us more loving, but can also turn us into that chick from The Exorcist with projectile vomiting, head spinning, and fire shooting out of our eyes (only a slight exaggeration).  Now if you are one of the rare few that have a phenomenal wife who can handle hormone changes like a pro, count yourself lucky.  In fact, go buy a lottery ticket.  But if you aren't, then I am here to help you.

During my pregnancy, and for a few months after, my hormones and emotions were all over the place.  This was the hardest time for both me and my husband and put quite a strain on our marriage.  After LOTS of loooooooooong talks (and yelling, and crying, and more yelling and crying) we eventually worked it out.  But I want to share my wisdom with you and hopefully prevent you from making the same mistakes we did.

I have put together a short quiz to see how you will rate in dealing with the hormonal blow outs that may occur.  Choose the answer that best describes what you would do and keep track of them.  At the end, see how you did.  Will you be a champion at supporting your wife and have her bragging to all her friends about how wonderful you are?  Let's find out.

Mood Swing Scenario Quiz

1.  You're watching TV together and a commercial comes on for baby lotion.  You look over at your wife and notice she's crying.  Do you:
A. Start laughing hysterically.
B. Sit there uncomfortably in silence, unsure of what to do.
C. Hand her a box of tissues and say "I can't wait either.  You are going to be a fantastic mother."

2.  You're talking together when all of a sudden your wife gets quiet.  You ask her what's wrong and she says she thinks she's having a hormonal moment because she took offense to something you said but doesn't think you meant anything by it.  Do you:
A. Immediately start arguing with her for being upset when you didn't do anything wrong.
B. Just sit there uncomfortably in silence.
C. Calmly reassure her that you weren't trying to offend her and ask if there is anything you can do to help.

3.  You walk into the bedroom to find your wife sitting on the bed crying, holding her wedding rings in her hand.  You ask her what's wrong and she says her rings don't fit anymore and she feels like a fat cow.  Do you:
A. Start laughing hysterically and tell her she's being stupid, it's just water weight from the pregnancy.
B. Sit next to her and say nothing.
C. Kneel on the floor in front of her and tell her she is as beautiful as the day you got married, and suggest putting the rings on a necklace so she can still wear them.

4.  You're eating breakfast when your wife suddenly goes running for the bathroom to throw up.  Do you:
A. Slam your fork down and say thanks for ruining my appetite!
B. Sit there frozen, trying to block out the sound of her vomiting.
C. Go running after her to help hold her hair back.

5.  Your wife just got done cleaning the kitchen and asks you to take out the garbage.  You are watching TV and say sure thing, but decide to wait until a commercial comes on.  Twenty minutes later, you hear the lid to the garbage can slam to the floor and realize you had forgotten all about it.  You listen as she tears the bag from the can and goes storming outside, slamming the door on her way out.  When she comes back in do you:
A. Immediately start arguing with her, saying you were going to do it after the show was over.
B. Just sit there, unsure of what to do.
C. Go to her and apologize for forgetting about the trash.  Tell her the kitchen looks great and ask if there is anything you can do to help her.

Results

If your answers were mostly A's, you failed miserably.  If you don't learn some patience and grow a thicker skin then it is going to be a VERY long nine months (or more) for you.  Try to be more supportive of your wife and keep in mind that this is a hard time for her and she's relying on you to help her through it.

If your answers were mostly B's, you need a kick in the butt.  While doing nothing may seem like a good idea, it can often backfire on you.  Instead of trying to ignore the situation, try to comfort your wife in any way you can.  Ask her if there is anything you can do to help her as often as you can.  This may help avoid some of these scenarios in the future.

If your answers were mostly C's, congratulations!  You are the husband that wives love to brag about to their family and friends.  Keep up the good work!

No matter what your results were, just remember, this is temporary (though it may seem like it will never end).  You don't want to say or do anything that may cause irreparable harm to your marriage.  This is supposed to be a happy time, for both of you.  Enjoy it!  Soon you will have a new baby that will change your lives forever.  Don't waste these few months you have left by arguing all the time.  If you go the extra mile to make your wife happy trust me, she will appreciate it immensely!

I hope you have found this helpful.  Good luck!